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Interview with the author
What did you find most difficult about writing Disobedience? Was there anything about writing it that took you by surprise?
Probably the most difficult thing was the same thing that many first novelists find difficult – just keeping morale up! Writing a book is a long lonely business and I found that my confidence in my own ability to actually finish the book would take sudden despairing dips. The lovely thing about having actually published a book now is that at least I no longer worry about my own capacity to produce a finished draft. In terms of things that took me by surprise… I think I was surprised by my own reluctance to write about my community. I found that I had some sort of inner combatant pushing back at me all the time saying the things that people in my community often say "this mustn't be written about, it's better it should be kept private". Over time, I think, my internal arguments about that became folded into the novel.
How autobiographical is your novel?
Hmm. Well. The events of the novel haven't actually ever happened to me. Both my parents are, thankfully, still with us, I'm not married and I've never yet had an affair with a married man. Perhaps it would be true to say that while the events of the novel are invented, the backgrounds are all places I've been. I have lived in Manhattan, I even had a fairly-high-powered job at one time. Dovid's headaches are mine, I've had them since I was a child. I grew up in Hendon, and in the Orthodox way of life. And, like most adults, I've experienced love and desire and heartbreak.
As children, Ronit, Dovid and Esti develop a close friendship which in the case of Ronit and Esti develops into something more. Years later, when Ronit returns to London, how would you describe how the characters' individual perceptions of that time have changed?
All of them have fictionalised it to some extent, I think. Ronit has made that love less than it really was in her mind. It has become caught up in her rebellion, in her desire to rid herself of Orthodoxy so that she can only see it as a symbol, and is surprised to find that Esti is a real flesh-and-blood person, whom she has actually hurt. Esti has made it more than it was – they were teenagers, and even if they'd been able to play the whole thing out without the interference of Orthodoxy it probably wouldn't have lasted forever. But for Esti it was the only time she ever expressed the sexual side of herself freely. She's become caught in that time, in those experiences – just as Ronit has tangled up rebellion and love, Esti has tangled up sexuality and Ronit, as if Ronit were the only person who could ever awake those feelings in her. Of all of them, Dovid probably has the clearest sense of what went on. His hope has always been, I think, that there could be movement.
Like Ronit, you grew up in London and spent time working in New York. As a Jewish woman, how have your experiences living in the two cities compared?
New York is better. Sorry to have to say it. For Jews, New York is better. Living in New York was a complete revelation to me about the parity of treatment I could expect as a Jew. It's the little things: on the television news, as well as wishing viewers a Merry Christmas at Christmas time, the newsreaders wish a happy Passover at Passover time. I really can't imagine such a thing happening in England. This is not to say that there aren't a lot of wonderful things about England – I came back, after all! And that culture in New York hasn't been created out of nothing. The Jewish community there is confident and vocal. I think the Jewish community in the UK could learn a lot about the benefits of being very visible, as opposed to the dignified invisibility that the British Jewish community cultivates.
What was the reaction of the Orthodox Jewish community to the publication of the hardback edition of Disobedience in 2005?
Heh. Well, the Orthodox Jewish community isn't homogenous, so there have been quite a few different kinds of reaction. The really right wing side of the community hasn't even noticed that the book exists (or if it has, it's not saying anything about it). The more left-wing end are delighted and keep inviting me to speak at various synagogue book groups, which is lovely. I've been stopped on the streets a few times in Hendon by Orthodox Jews, most of whom have been extremely positive, and only one of whom told me he thought my book was "filthy". The Jewish Chronicle, the organ of Anglo-Jewry, gave the book the most bitter and venomous review it received anywhere, but I can't tell if that was because the reviewer a) really thought it was a terrible book, b) felt threatened by the exposure of the community or c) wished they'd thought of it first.
When you write a novel, is it an evolutionary process or do you know exactly where you want it to go from the first page?
For this book, definitely evolution not revolution. I started with a short story which I wrote while I was still living in New York – it was about the character who eventually turned into Esti. When I finished that story I found I still had a lot to say, and when I started my Creative Writing MA at UEA I pulled it out and thought, in a rather offhand fashion "oh, I'll write a novel about this". The first few chapters just fell out without too much difficulty but I think somewhere around chapter 4 or 5 I started to realise that I needed a much firmer idea of where I was going, so sat down with a big sheet of paper and, over a couple of weeks, planned the rest of the book out in more detail. Having said that, when I came to write the second draft a whole lot of that got taken out and redone. It'd be lovely to think that it was possible to sit down and write a perfect book straight off, but actually most writing is really rewriting, trying to get it right.
What do you enjoy most about being a writer, and what do you think are the drawbacks?
Enjoyment: I can't get over the fact that I'm now paid to make stuff up. As a child, I was quite a good and creative liar but felt very guilty about it. Now I'm honest in real life because I have somewhere constructive to put all my fantasist tendencies. The isolation of writing can be difficult, but I'm very lucky in that I have another job – as lead writer for a computer games company – which is very social and collaborative. I tend to spend my mornings in glorious isolation, thinking about the book I'm working on and then spend the afternoons bouncing ideas back and forth with my colleagues, inventing different kinds of peril to put our heroes in.
Where do you look for inspiration for your writing?
Inspiration can come from anywhere – it's just important to be open to it. I strongly believe in following hunches, in exploring things that tug at you saying "look at this" without judging in advance where it might lead you or what you think you're doing. Inspiration comes from the book about giant squid you pull down off the shelf in the school library when you're supposed to be doing your homework. It comes from the daydream you have on the bus about the beautiful person sitting opposite you when you're "supposed" to be reading a novel. It comes from giving yourself room to think, from not thinking that you have to spend all your time doing useful things. It comes from anything that fascinates you and from staring into space. Boredom is very important for inspiration.
Who are your favourite writers and who influences your writing?
Oh, so many! I love Borges and Saki. Ali Smith's writing is so good I often read it out loud to myself, to taste the words. No one does a plot better than Dumas – the Count of Monte Cristo is a master class in plot. I love Douglas Adams and Neil Gaiman – I have this fantasy that one day I'll encounter Neil Gaiman at some "writer's thing" and will tell him how I worship his work, and then he'll say "um, who are you?" He's not a book writer, but I am similarly worshipful at the feet of Joss Whedon – everything I know about an end-of-chapter hook I learned from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I fell in love with the writing of Ovid when I was in school and he never ceases to delight. I love anyone who can make me laugh, and anyone who can amaze me.
What are your top 10 favourite books of all time?
This is in constant flux, but as of today and in no particular order:
The Vintner's Luck – Elizabeth Knox
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency – Douglas Adams
Brief Lives – Neil Gaiman
The Art of Love – Ovid
Serious Concerns – Wendy Cope
Interview with the Vampire – Anne Rice
The Conscience of the Rich – CP Snow
The Book of Sand – Jorge Luis Borges
The Chronicles of Clovis - Saki
and if I'm allowed a play, The Crucible – Arthur Miller
What are you working on now?
I am working on a new book, about Oxford, about friendship and love and – I find - about the strangeness of Christianity if you happen to be looking at it from the standpoint of being Jewish. But I don't want to say a lot about it in case I jinx it.
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Author interviews
